Your recent gesture of jealousy and mocking has surprised me. And feeling quite sad about it, I decided to take the silent way out and blog my feelings.
I am aware that I don’t belong to the category of beautiful people and I am not unhappy about it. I’ve given a deaf ear to your daily rants as well. But you’ve crossed the line by questioning my love for my beau.

Well, it does not lessen my feelings at all for him, but it does show me your soot-filled heart. You remind me of a few beautiful lines from the movie ‘Serendipity’. “The Greeks don’t write obituaries. They ask only one question – Does he have passion?” Because passion my friend is what makes a person an achiever, a lover and who believes in himself.

I’m sorry to say, you lack the passion to appreciate beautiful things in life, be it physical or of the mind. You measure every ounce on this earth with money. Money can’t find you true love. It makes you envious of every little thing in this world. You lose your existence as nothing fits in the category of good for you.

I turned 25!!

Another birthday passed away! This time 25! Not a good year for celebrating birthdays. Every time I told to myself ‘I will be 25’ my heart missed a beat. Growing scarier and larger as days went by, finally it arrived (on the 1st of may)

It was different, different as my friends missed out the usual b’day party tradition. Parents tried their best to make me feel I am still a kid. Mom made sure that dad got me a colorful cake. “Mama, I’m 25. boo –hooo!”

Six days past the ‘thee-day’ I still feel the same. I am 25 mama, boo hoo!

I can’t get teddy’s another more on my birthdays. I would have to save it for my kids, kids! Oh-my god!! Don’t let me turn 30 please, please.

!

There is a thin line between a nothing, a thin-line dividing married from being married. Difficult to explain never understood! Our society believes that marriages are made in heaven. We choose a man of honestly and integrity for you, tie you in the knot and set you forth to have a happy life. We do drop in once in a while to check if you are doing well, if the man we selected is keeping you happy.

That’s the concept which has crept into our society. We don’t question our society because we make the society. Questioning it would be like questioning ourselves.

And there is other concept of being married. You follow your heart, chose the man you would love to spend time with and slowly realize that it’s not just time but your whole life you would love to share with each other. Realizing that marriages are made in heaven but it is upon us to work on it.

Such thoughts come naturally to me these days. I’m sure you must have guessed it. That’s right! I am on the verge of getting married. While defining marriage from being married, I was asking myself. Where do I belong? As I love this man, but parents are to decide on how, where, when etc should we get married. Such daily ramblings are making me wonder ‘Why the hell am I getting married?’

I don’t want to marry to add on a list of responsibilities to my new status. I wish to enjoy life and not dread it. Would love to share feelings, argue and pamper myself with emotions.

Naah! Get real, that’s not gonna happen my child! Happiness is my big tourist, and love a nasty tenant. Here I am trying to cross this thin line and give a clear picture. We are a mess, complicated little creatures, giving a brain to which, God, is a big mistake!